The end of an era

Last night was really sad, yet when I tell people why I’m not sure they’ll truly “get” it. You see, as an adult woman without children it’s a bit hard to make friends. Sure, I have friendly relationships at work. I love my team, but I’m a boss. That basically means that I can only reallly be friends with other bosses at work and that just hasn’t happened. Not that they are bad people, I just don’t have anything in common with them outside of the fact that we are both bosses. Most women I know talk about the friends they have from one of two places: their children’s school or church. As I’ve already said, I don’t have kids and I think I’d likely be arrested if I just randomly hung out at the neighborhood elementary school so I could chat with the moms. A bit stalker-ish, I fear and that probably wouldn’t make me a good candidate for mom-friends. So that leaves church. I don’t go to church and even when I did I wasn’t friendly with anyone there. Most of the people I encountered at the church were very judgmental and closed minded, which also explains why I no longer go to church. So since I’m not a parent or a church-goer where do I meet friends? The answer, wine tastings.

Hubby and I discovered Wine Styles about two years ago. The owner, Brian, was a friendly guy who taught us tons about wine. We discovered that we like our wine red and bold. We also discovered that we like the people who attend the wine tastings. Wine tastings were held on Friday and Saturday nights. Hubby and I always went on Saturdays and quickly became part of the standard “Saturday night group”. We would chat with Brian and we met some great people there. We’d go to the tasting at about 5:00 p.m. every Saturday night. We’d be there until about 7:00 and then we’d either go out with one of the couples we met there or we’d go home — happy, social and a bit more mellow than we were at 4:55.

We met some great people that we likely wouldn’t have met anywhere else. There was the high school teacher/ex-military pilot and his wife, the accountant. There was the cop and his wife, the counselor who works with the homeless. There was the guy who grew up in Michigan (like me) and his wife who sometimes brought their two Yorkie dogs with her to the wine tasting. There was the handsome doctor and his barbie-doll fiance. There were Brian’s grown daughters who occasionally helped out at the store. There was the cop who rode a Harley and could make you laugh until wine spurted from your nose. These are good people. They are fun, interesting people who I probably would never have had a chance to meet had it not been for the wine tasting. Some of these people we’ve already gone out with. Some of them I hoped we would have the chance to. One always thinks that there’s more time. But for us, and for our wine store, the time ran out last night.

I had been suspicious that the store was not faring well with the economy and when I got the word that there wouldn’t be a tasting on Saturday, November 1st, I was even more concerned. But we’ve been going for a long time, surely Brian would give us the heads-up if something was up. Surely there is more time. When I got the panicked call from our friend, the accountant, she said “it’s an emergency, you’ve got to come because Brian’s closing the store for good tonight.” My mouth dropped open, I couldn’t believe it. I left my friend who I’d been shopping and hanging out with (there was no tasting that night, so I wasn’t in a big hurry to get home) – Sorry Jean, didn’t mean to abandon you – and called Hubby and told him to get over to the store as quickly as he could. We showed up almost at the same time and I was stunned at the number of people in the small store. Somehow the word had gotten out to all of the regulars from Friday and Saturday night. People were buying bottles of wine and Brian would open them and we all drank while trying to digest the concept that this was the last night. Pictures were taken. Toasts were made. I cried — a lot.

Most of the people left around 9pm, but a few of us — me and hubby, the teacher and the accountant, the cop and the counselor and the Michigan guy — stayed and helped pack up the store. I’ve not cried so much in a long time. Tears ran down my cheeks the entire time I bagged wine — four to a bag, no more or the bottom will break. As I write this now, I’m crying again. You see, this wasn’t just a wine store that happened to have tastings. It was so much more than that. It was a gathering place for friends. It was the place I looked forward to going to, not because of the wine necessarily, but because of the people. It feels like a death.

I’m happy for Brian, he has a great opportunity out of state for a new job. He deserves it, he worked too hard doing his full time job plus the store and with the economy the store closing was simply a matter of time. But I’m really sad for me. Perhaps we’ll all see each other again at another tasting at another store, but it won’t be the same. You sometimes really can’t get the magic back. And this was a magical place.

Happy Indepelloween!

The city I live in wasn’t able to have it’s July 4th fireworks display due to an incoming storm.  So… they postponed them… until today.  During a festival celebrating Halloween we had costume contests, jack-o-lantern carving, a haunted maze, games, and… you guessed it… fireworks.  Fireworks set to a patriotic soundtrack.  Now let me tell you it was nice, because in July in Phoenix your skin practically melts off just between your car and the building you are heading towards, so sitting outside just for the heck of it in July is one step away from crazy.  But we do it.  Tonight however was nice, almost chilly in fact, and I sincerely enjoyed the fireworks.  I do wonder, however, what a visitor would think with all the people dressed up as everything from ghosts, witches, Sarah Palin (shudder) and the guys from Ghostbusters watching fireworks set off to Lee Greenwoods “Proud to be an American” (or whatever that song is called).  It had to be fairly comical to see.

Nonetheless I wish you all a Happy (or would it be Merry) Indepelloween!!!  May your trick-or-treating be only intermittently disrupted by firework displays.

The ugly stench of prejudice

Foolishly I thought that we had come far enough as a society that we actually could elect the first non-caucasian president.  I believed that the race and gender bigotry and prejudice was something that we were leaving in our past and that we were embracing a future of acceptance, if not understanding.  I was wrong.  Today two events really woke me up about the bias and just plain nastiness that is still a part of the American experience. 

The first such reminder was some tape recorded messages people had left at the offices of ACORN today regarding Barack Obama.  To put it nicely the statements these “people” made were so foul that nearly every three words they spoke had to be bleeped out.  The people who made these statements must be home tonight starching their white hoods and getting their gasoline and crosses ready for a good old-fashioned Klan party.  Lynchings, N* words, “death to them all” was pretty much the main focus of these callers.  I was saddened to see that we really hadn’t come too far, at all.

Then I came home and while making dinner checked out AZCentral.com which is the website for the Arizona Republic — the main Phoenix newspaper.  There they had this story about a Missouri middle school where, during “Spirit Week”, some students face punishment for creating “Hit a Jew Day”.   School officials seemed to want to calm down the horrified responses of people like me by saying that “fewer than 10 of the district’s 35 Jewish students were struck”.  Really?  Only a third?  Oh, okay that makes it fine then.  Honestly… who thinks that only hitting a third of the Catholic kids would be okay?  Or the Methodist kids?  And the brilliant school official goes on to say that “in most case, students were hit on the back of their shoulders but one student was slapped in the face”.  Does the fact that these great Protestant kids only hit their Jewish classmates on the back or the shoulders (mostly) really make a difference?  If they’d hit them on the legs or the arms would we have just chuckled to ourselves and said “oh those silly kids…”? 

I really just don’t get this.  It’s 2008, people.  Wake the hell up and look around you.  Everyone is different.  That’s what this country was founded upon… differences.  If we can’t learn to embrace what made us a nation, where will we be in the future?  Where will we be tomorrow?  When will we grow up and, in the words of a true spokesman, “give peace a chance”?

Innocence lost

Times change, and not always for the better…

Tomorrow is my wedding anniversary and since we met in October (and got married in October MANY years later) we go to the Arizona State Fair every year because that’s where our true first date was.  We go and play some stupid games and win some cheap stuffed animal that was likely made in China and dipped in lead, and we eat bad food.  It’s a tradition.

We went to the fair on Friday night and were surprised to see that instead of paying your $5.00 to the guy/gal at the game, the fair has gone to a cash-less system.  Basically you have to buy a card that is loaded with “tickets” and each game takes a certain number of tickets.  All the people who run the games have little scanners attached to them and they scan the card and, essentially, debit out the credits.   I found this to be disconcerting.  I’m not sure why, really… but it really ruined the fair experience for me.  There was something so… impersonal about swiping a card to play a mindless game and win a silly prize that I just couldn’t do it.  We walked around for awhile but we didn’t play any games and we didn’t even eat the food… the innocence of the fair seems to be tainted for me.  And I’m not sure I’ll ever get it back.  A shame, really.

Horror Movie Loneliness… or Lusting for Demons

It’s Halloween and between the economy and the political discord that is my household, I need a good Halloween movie diversion.  Let me just start out by saying that I love horror movies.  Good ones, decent ones, and even, on occassion, just plain bad ones.  The bad ones aren’t scary so much as kind of comical in a strangely campy way and can be fun if one is in the right mood.   But tonight I really want to watch a good one.  And ones that I haven’t already seen a bunch of times are really pretty hard to find.

I come by my love of horror naturally, from my mother.  Though in all honesty I don’t know that she actually loved it.  She just really hated Disney movies and rather than take me to see those she’d take me to see things like “The Amityville Horror” or “The Changeling” (the scary one, not the Angelina one which, if scary, would be scary for a completely different reason).  I remember watching “The Exorcist” around the age of nine or so, and watched “Salem’s Lot” when it first came on as a mini-series with David Soul.  I read anything and everything that was reasonably scary and to this day I’d much rather read a great supernatural horror novel than anything else.  Yes, I prefer supernatural but will take a decent serial killer too, just leave me out of the alien horror most of the time.   But I’m having difficulty finding good horror that I haven’t already seen.  Anyone know of a good supernatural horror movie that will be a good addition to my horror movie love?  I’m all ears… well not really but in a horror movie — I COULD be all ears.  Really.  Suggestions?

An Inter-party Marriage

When two people of different religious faiths marry, they call it an interfaith marriage and people worry about how the marriage will survive because of the vast differences in the religions of the couple.  How will the children be raised?  What happens on holidays?  Will one partner have to convert to the other’s faith?  When two people of different political views marry, very few people really notice.  But, I can tell you that an inter-party marriage can be trying.  Especially at election time. 

 

I am a liberal democrat.  I was raised by democrats (I’m actually probably more liberal than my family was, but my grandmother was a true blue-blooded democrat) and I share the beliefs of the democratic party.  I vote in all of the national elections and most of the state elections.  In the elections I have been eligible to vote in I have voted for:  Dukakis, Clinton, Clinton, Gore, Kerry and soon… Obama.  My husband is a republican.  I can’t say he’s an extreme republican but he does share the republican beliefs and his family is devoutly republican.  He has voted for (I believe): Bush, Bush, Dole, Bush, Kerry (who knew?) and soon (I fear)… McCain.

 

Sometimes I’m able to joke that I just have to be sure to vote to negate my husband’s vote.  Sometimes I can just keep all my political beliefs inside and just keep quiet to keep some semblance of peace in my household.  But sometimes, like in this election, it’s just pretty damn hard to keep my big mouth shut.  I don’t believe ANYONE should vote for McCain and I’ve tried my hardest to explain that to my loving spouse.  He, though he’s a bright and college educated man, happens to believe most of what the republican media tries to tell him.  I’m sure he views me and my beliefs much the same way and is equally frustrated with me. 

 

So rather than fight, which we have done about this election, I vow to try to keep my mouth shut and only gloat a little when Obama wins.  Election night should be a blast here, huh?  Who wants to have an election viewing party at my house?  Nobody?  <crickets>  Sigh… guess it’ll just be me and my republican hubby desperately trying to find reruns of Law & Order to watch so we don’t kill each other over the results.  Maybe I should rent a movie…

OMG!!! Must watch over and over…

HYSTERICAL… and hummable and horribly evil (or trying to be at least)… Go watch it.  I won’t tell you again.

http://www.drhorrible.com/mushortio.html

Antwerp or bust…

It’s just a suggestion…

Independence Day Thoughts Set to Music

Happy July 4th!  Today, we, along with half of the country, will be heading out to watch fireworks to celebrate Independence Day.  Where Warped One and I go, they have a nice little grassy area (better to sit and bake on in this 110 degree heat) and they always have a couple of bands play prior to the fireworks extravaganza.  Then, of course, during the show (fireworks) there is music playing to accompany the fireworks as they explode in the sky.  The songs they play are always pretty much the same… some pop fare, and the obligatory Neil Diamond “America” and Lee Greenwood’s “God Bless the USA”.  This year, there are a few songs I’d love to hear them include, but it will never happen…  those songs are:

“Dear Mr. President” by Pink.  Such a poignant song.

“Bring ‘Em Home” by Bruce Springsteen.  What an amazing cover of the Pete Seeger classic, with some timely updates.

“Pennsylvania Stars” by Paul Hipp. 

and lastly, “Livin’ In The Future” by Bruce Springsteen.  What a frightening future that is…

Happy 4th of July.  May our soldiers be safe and may this unlawful occupation end swiftly and safely.

A symbol I can believe in…

In a previous post I mentioned my dislike of the Christian fish symbol on cars.  This is what I’m truly tempted to put on my car… it’s something I do believe in and think we need a lot more of. 

Want your own?  Click here to see all the choices and buy one for all the peace-lovers you know.